"Verily, Allah, with Him (Alone) is the knowledge of the hour, He sends down the rain, and Knows what is in the wombs. No person knows what he will earn tomorrow and no person knows in what land he will die. Verily, Allah is All-Knower, All-Aware (of all things)." [Surah Luqman, 34]
This pregnancy is different from my first one in terms of financial status. When I planned to have Khairaldin, both Iskandar and I had a "stable" job. So we thought it was the 'right' time to have a baby. However, 5 months down the line, I got made redundant. Iskandar continued his studies which made him reduced his working hours until today.
Then, almost a week ago, I found out I was pregnant with my second child. We were both shocked and didn't know what to expect. Iskandar works for about 4 hours a week, which is really not enough for us to actually get thru the month. Alhamdulillah, my parents willingly invited us to stay with them. Otherwise we'd be so broke and on debts by now. No one in the right state of mind would dream to get pregnant when they do not have financial stability, right? Same goes with us. But Allah works in mysterious ways. We can plan all we want but HE has the last say. It took Iskandar and I quite a while to digest the news that I am pregnant. But we had to face the fact that if I'm not having my period means, I am pregnant. So we were thankful to Allah that we are yet again blessed with another child. Insha'Allah.
About 3 weeks ago, Iskandar asked for an increase in his contract hours since he's finished his Masters. The company been pushing the matter aside and kept telling him to meet with this that and the other. Which never got settled. I found out about my pregnancy last Thursday. So we were already 'scared' of what to happen with our financial. But we shukur, tawakkal and redha with what we already have. We always believe that Allah will never burden us with what we can not handle Surah Baqarah verse 286: "Allah does not lay a responsibility on anyone beyond his capacity. In his favour shall be whatever good each one does, and against him whatever evil does.". After all we've got 9 months to really push ourselves out there. Insha'Allah.
Iskandar planned to meet his HR yesterday to sort out the contract but surprise surprise, the Manager came and spoke to him instead. They told him that they approved the increase of his hours and that he shall start next week!!! What are the odds, exactly 1 week after I find out I was pregnant he managed to change his contract??! We waited for so long for their reply but they kept turning is away.
So, as the Ayat above confirms, only Allah knows everything and anything. HE can give what HE feel is right to be given at that time. Never lose faith!!!! He is just testing us to see if we would give up. If Allah doesn't answer our prayer as when we want HIM to, believe that he has much better plans for us. Doesn't mean HE is not listening to our prayers but instead HE knows whether we really need it or not. I mean, if Iskandar were to get the job earlier, I might become spendthrift. So when the pregnancy news arrive, I might not be able to control my expenditure. But now, I know which is my priority and how to spend wisely because I have managed to live with lesser income than we are expecting soon. Alhamdulillah shukur!!!!!
Here's a reminder for myself and everyone that's reading, we should not question what is given to us even when we feel the time is not right. Who are we to determine when is the right time? When I came across this Ayat, it definitely was a wake up call to me. Now I realise that I can only plan to a certain extent and the rest, it is all up to HIM!!!